the me i like

i've been painting in my journal and cutting inspirational words out of magazines for a vision book that i'm creating, which sounds soothing and even a bit zen like, but those things are almost always followed with the huge mistake of checking my phone and all of a sudden facebook grabs me in a chokehold of sorts, holds me hostage as i beg to be let go of, asks for a ridiculous ransom {like "turn off your phone and walk away and you'll never see me again"} and instantly my afternoon of simple pleasures has disappeared and been replaced with stupid cat videos and ten reasons why i'm actually more of an introvert than anyone gives me credit for. sigh.

this is me without my phone in sight and i like that me. i like the me that laughs when her feet get stuck in the wet sand pockets that feel like quicksand and imagines that that "quicksand" is sucking her down into an abyss where mermaids probably hang out when the sun gets too hot. i like the me that chases sand crabs around in circles, occasionally having to show off her extraordinary ninja like moves dance a bit because they get just a little too close for comfort.

and i especially like the me that takes jumping photos. in this group shot, their teacher raised her shoulders a bit and  said to me, "confidentiality might be a problem"  when i approached her about this whole classroom  photo and i said, "no problem at all. let's have them all jump backwards" and then she smiled, took my business card, gathered the kids all together and applauded their efforts. 

so the question of the day::

do you get easily distracted by your phone and/or facebook?

do you not get things accomplished because of getting lost in the instagram/facebook vortex?

or did all of that happen to you and now you have a solution?

please share!!!

when the sun goes down

it's impossible to not appreciate the beauty surrounding me right now and even though it's all familiar, i'm soaking it in like i've never seen it before. maybe it's the oranges, or the blues or the fifty shades of grey and brown. i'm really not sure...but i do know, that i'm inhaling it all and feeling blessed and grateful and even a bit giddy.

and so it begins…again

to the precious girl in the first photo…i'm so sorry, but oops. your shirt came up a bit further than i realized and even though i had you take off your necklace so it wouldn't bonk you in the face, your pony tail decided to be a little uncooperative. thank you both for being so much fun…and sheesh, how do men jump so high?

and to these adorable kids, all i can say is wow…what amazing hair…but it was your passion to keep jumping…and jumping…and jumping until we got "the photo" that impressed me the most. thank you so much for making me smile!!!

a little more time

it's not that i ever want to bring the old year with me like a security blanket, it's just that maybe i don't want to completely bare myself to the new year too quickly. that maybe i need a few more dates and some serious "wooing" before i can commit. that maybe i just need a little more time.

over the past few years, i've noticed that january tends to be my month to move slowly. to readjust. to move cautiously. i know there are others who can jump into the new year instantly with both feet, capes flying high and happy behind them while they kick the air with ninja like moves, but not me. instead you're more apt to find me raising my freshly licked finger into the air, checking to see which way the wind is blowing and then having the nerve to possibly question the results…{but only if the polar vortex, that arrived once again this year, doesn't freeze and cause that finger and all of its roommates to fall off prior to the air check}

so i'm hoping as the days move along, my blog posts increase and my energy soars. i'm hoping the words that wedged themselves into all of my thoughts and dreams while a cold kept me down, come pouring out. i'm hoping that a change in scenery keeps my camera so busy it bows down and thanks me for making it feel alive. i'm hoping that this year,  my year to reclaim so much...is finally beginning.

{this is an old barn we discovered right before our late winter snow arrived. a barn i'd love to trespass in. a barn that unfortunately is watched by the daughter who lives down the road, never allowing me to  trespass. i know this only because she caught us and questioned us…in the nicest way…just for taking photos. darn. i really want to trespass. see the roof on the bottom left? that's the old farmhouse that i couldn't even get close enough to to shoot. did i mention i really want to trespass? ugh}

you knew it would happen, or at least i did

i'm blessed to be a woman with the ability to change her mind and not be scoffed at when she does. well,  at least i hope nobody will be scoffing after they read this and instead will choose to cheer along with me….cause "i'm happy" {clap along if you feel like a room without a roof}

anyhow, i'm a week into the new year and a week ago right here, here on my blog, i proudly professed, proclaimed, whatever that my word for two thousand fifteen was going to be WRITE...and guess what? i'm changing my word. yep, just like that. presto change-o. 

i quickly came to realize that there's something i want to do more of all year long, which is WRITE, but  WRITE just can't be my word. it can be my mantra maybe, my theme, a daily reminder or my screensaver {which it is} but it's not my "intention" and in choosing a word it really needs to be an intention, a way of living, a direction or basically a word that will empower you and/or keep you on a specific path. {like in the years past when i chose reach, emerge and focus for example}

so my new word {are you on the edge of your seat?} is RECLAIM.

over the past few years, due to so many things {being an empty nester, fear, feeling insecure, moving, jealousy, etc.} i lost pieces of myself. maybe you even noticed, or maybe you didn't see a thing. {if that's the case, then i did a damn good job of covering it up} so this year, i'm reclaiming what was lost, left behind…or basically what got buried in a bunch of yuck.

back out into the open will come:

my positive and i-can-do-that attitude

my determination and drive

my confidence

my passion 

my mojo

and so many other things that have always made me, me.

of course there's also the reclamation of me as in…getting my ass back in shape. i turned fifty in august and it's time to bring back a healthier way of life with exercise being at the top of the list. i don't want to eat kale, so that's not going to happen, but other better food choices will happen {always followed by a piece of chocolate because life is too short} and exercising or doing something everyday that makes my heart rate go up, is the plan. yesterday i danced. i just danced wildly all over the family room to the music on my phone, raising my arms on purpose to really get my heart rate up and high stepping like was i killing tarantulas….but you know what, it worked. i laughed at myself every time i caught myself in the mirror and i had fun and you know what? when you're fifty, you find a word to use for the new year, your head cold has finally taken the high road out of here and you can breathe again making dancing even possible….life is good.

hello 2015. hello word.

here she is. 2015...and upon meeting her this morning, i somewhat bashfully reached my arms out, brought her close to my body while lightly rubbing her back with my {less than they should be} confident hands and then whispered into her ear, "be nice. we're in this together you know" and as she pulled away, her eyes locked on mine and her head nodded. then i heard her whisper, "let's do this."

working with susannah again {and approximately eight hundred other woman} i proclaimed my "word" last night right before we decided there was no way we were going to stay awake to watch the ball drop. sooooo,  {i'm so dramatic} drum roll please……WRITE.

WRITE is my word for two thousand fifteen, and as strong as it is, even powerful, it doesn't stand alone. in the process of finding it and doing the exercises with susannah, write is joined by catalyst and creative and intuition, release, forward, authentic and gypsy. oh my heavens…words, words, words. i just love them and i love what they mean, what they offer and what they can do. some people get excited over a new recipe, new bedding or even a new car…but for me, words are just the greatest gift ever.

so welcome two thousand fifteen. i hope you don't mind that i'm jumping into you with both feet, a smile almost described as wicked on my face, a spark in my eye and my safety net packed comfortably away to be used at another time…or maybe never again.